![]() This takes away much of the danger of these creatures. They do physically interact with the world they just do not interact with our characters. We see at one point the collateral movement of a monster chasing after Sandy and the kids, shoving trees and other forest vegetation aside. Just because the monsters don't attack anyone wearing a blue sweatshirt with a googly-eyed reindeer doesn't mean this is standard. Just because the monsters haven't done something yet doesn't mean they might not be able to. I don't know if this is a natural limitation, a choice, or simply anecdotal evidence that will be disproved. The monsters are only a threat when you look at them, which is fine, except they cannot or choose to refrain from physically interacting with their human targets. Given the unknowable nature of monsters, I'm not expecting a textbook but some level of consistency that won't rip me out of the film. Part of the problem with Bird Box is that the monsters never feel that threatening because the hazy rules manage to defang them. Meanwhile, she flashes back to the first few days of the monster outbreak when she found security in a stranger's home until things went from bad to worse to murderous. She's traveling down river with her two children, all blindfolded. Malorie (Sandra Bullock) is trying to navigate the post-apocalyptic world of monsters. It's a fittingly entertaining movie with too many structural flaws, underdeveloped ideas, and diminished tension and stakes. Bird Box isn't a movie worth strong feelings, both good and bad. I know people who hate this movie with a passion and go into apoplexy trying to describe their disgust. Netflix has reported that over 40 million customers have watched Bird Box in its first week of its streaming release, which basically means 35 million people likely fell asleep to Netflix and it started playing the new high-profile movie on auto play. It's about killer monsters that cause people to violently kill themselves upon sight. But you would have to be blind not to see that.Īs a film critic, I feel compelled to write about Bird Box because, apparently, one third of the entire Internet is currently talking about this Netflix sci-fi horror movie. There is zero reason you should stream this movie. The best scenes are where Bullock is leading her two blindfolded children down a bleak, dangerous river. John Malcovich seems out of place here, as the unlikeable asshole of the group, but he does have a couple of scenes that redeem him and display his character actor chops. The other actors range from terrible to mediocre. This is something she has done for decades at this point, and Bullock knows that the middle-of-the-road star vehicle is no longer an option in todayâ(TM)s movie industry. Sandra Bullock is surprisingly good, trying her best to save a bad picture. Itâ(TM)s actually most comparable to a low budget zombie movie, complete with a group of stereotypical characters in a safe house, waiting around for their turn to die horribly. Bird Box is mostly boring, has terrible dialogue, filled with characters that irritate more than they engage, and is the most predictable movie Iâ(TM)ve seen in years. If It Comes at Night was the arthouse version, and A Quiet Place was the well-made popcorn version, this is the straight to DVD/streaming option. We have seen this kind of odd, post-apocalyptic story before and recently. So, what about the movie part of the fucking movie? Yeah, itâ(TM)s pretty terrible. (Netflix withholds that information, which is also quite questionable.) Either way, a lot of people were conned, and a lot of people made as ass of themselves wearing blindfolds for the world to see. It was likely that this brief phenomenon was not organic, and weâ(TM)ll never know how effective it was in terms of streaming numbers. So yes, Bird Box was in the estimation of many, a con-job by Netflix to inflate its numbers by creating a stupid challenge and then having reports and articles spread across social media to encourage people to click on a low-end Sandra Bullock movie that would have crashed and bombed had it been released theatrically. Bet you forgot about this one! I wish I could forget watching it. ![]() Rating: R (Language|Brief Sexuality|Bloody Images|Violence) ![]() To make it, they'll have to cover their eyes from the evil that chases them - and complete the trip blindfolded. Searching for hope and a new beginning, a woman and her children embark on a dangerous journey through the woods and down a river to find the one place that may offer sanctuary. ![]() The survivors must now avoid coming face to face with an entity that takes the form of their worst fears. When a mysterious force decimates the population, only one thing is certain - if you see it, you die. ![]()
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